Anakin gets drunk
by anakinlove
Summary: kind of self explanatory title, don't know if i'll continue this one. kinda funny i think. Anakin gets drunk and Ashoka has to keep him and everybody else out of trouble


Ashoka was running around like crazy, completely stressed out. The villagers, in celebration of becoming free from the separatists, had organized a bring your own booze party at the republic camp and everyone had shown up. Well, to make a long story short, every one, including Anakin, Obi-wan, and Rex had already gotten drunk, everyone that is, except for Ashoka, who now found herself trying to make sure none of them killed themselves.

The only reason Ashoka wasn't drunk was because she was smart enough not to down more then one pint. Of course, Anakin decided it would be such fun to drink while a circle of clones yelled chug, chug, chug and see weather he could drink more then Rex. Everyone was staggering around, running into walls and generally causing mayhem.

"Put that down Rex", said Ashoka, "you're going to kill yourself. Obi-wan don't touch that. Anakin, stop humping me. Cody, if I have to tell you one more time not to put your ass in the blender, I swear."

Then, one of the only clones that wasn't drunk ran up to Ashoka and said, "The Jedi council is calling."

"Great", said Ashoka, "that's all I need. I order you not to drink one glass, not even one, do you hear me."

"Yes sir", shouted the clone over the loud music. Ashoka ran off to the tent where the Jedi council was waiting in their little holographic images.

"Hello", said Ashoka, bowing low.

"Where is your master and why is there so much yelling and shouting and loud noise?" Mace asked, "Are you under attack?"

"Sort of, but um this is a bit of a bad time, can you call back later?" Ashoka asked hopefully.

"What is going on?" Mace asked suspiciously. Ashoka knew there was no point in lying so she told them the truth.

"Well", she said, "the villagers were so happy they were free from the separatists they had a little bring your own booze party and well, everyone is umm, how do I put this, they're all drunk."

"What", said Mace, "Surely not Obi-wan." Then, Obi-wan staggered by, running into tent walls.

"Bring on the vodka", he yelled, hiccupping and falling. Then, he staggered away.

"Wow", said Kit Fisto.

"Why aren't you drunk?" Saesee Tiin asked.

"To tell you the truth, I would be right now except Anakan drank so much I didn't get to it in time, but I was chugging mind you, I just stopped after my master grabbed me around the middle and started humping me. Talk about awkward. But anyway, I can talk to you."

"Ok", said Yarael Poof. "How is the conquest of Bakali going?"

"Very well actually we just finished taking over the planet but, wait, hold on just a second. Anakin", Ashoka screamed. "I told you five times already, we don't suck on spark plugs." There was a yelp in the back round, followed by some whimpering. "That's why, you burn your tongue. Come on, you're going to bed." Ashoka stepped by the hologram, dragging Anakin by his collar. "I'll just be a sec, I have to go put him to bed."

Anakin had a stupid grin on his face and waved "Hey mace", he said, "You're bald." Mace gave a disgusted look as Ashoka dragged Anakin away. Then, she came back. "I'm really sorry about this", she said, "I need to end this transmission now, I uhh need to go to the market place."

"Why?", Ki-Adi-Mundi asked.

"I need to pick up some Aspirin and some pepto bismal. There are going to be some serious aches and pains tomorrow after everyone wakes up and I need to be ready." Then, she turned around again and said, "Excuse me just one more moment. Obi-wan, I said to put the bottle down, you've had enough. No, no, Ohh that is so nasty, no, we don't do that with bottles, Rex, my force, don't drink out of that. I have to put them to bed too in a sec", she mumbled to herself. "But anyway yea, I'll probably need some bandages too so I really have to go."

"Will your troops be battle ready tomorrow if the droids attack?" Depa Billaba asked.

"I'd like to say yes, but no, probably not."

"What will you do if they attack?" Even Piell asked.

"Do a kamikaze most likely and take whoever isn't still suffering from over drinking."

"I will come with some men and give you aid, I am sure in your moment of weakness they will try to attack again", Adi Gallia said.

"Really", said Ashoka, "Ohh my force thank you so much, you don't know how much this means to me, but now I really have to go, so goodbye." Just before the transmission ended, they all saw Ashoka charging into the crowd yelling.

"Rex, put that down right now, no don't eat it, stupid."

The next day, Anakan was lying on his chest heaving into a bucket.

"I'll never get drunk again", he said miserably. Obi-wan was lying in a bed right across from him, hiccupping.

"How could I have done that to myself?" he said. Then, he heaved into the bucket. Ashoka patted his back affectionately.

"Poor babies, but this is what happens when you drink." Her voice was chiding, but too gentle and soothing for Anakin to want to retaliate. He just lay and felt miserable. Ashoka kissed the top of his head. She had pulled back his hair in a rough ponytail to keep it out of his face, which Anakan appreciated, but there wasn't much that could be done about Obi-wan's beard.

Ashoka had tried to trim it as short as she could, however, and it was doing all right. Then, the battle alarm sounded. Anakan started to get up, but collapsed, his head buzzing torturously.

"I can't get up", he groaned.

"Me neither", said Obi-wan.

"Its alright boys", said Ashoka, "Me and whomever else I can find that's sober will take care of this. "Be careful", Anakan managed to spurt out before throwing up again.


End file.
